The New York Times opinion columnist David Brooks wrote a column earlier this week with the provocative headline 'The Sandra Bullock Trade.' It raises a fascinating sociological question, when one is able to get past misperceiving his introduction.
《纽约时报》(New York Times)观点专栏作家布鲁克斯(David Brooks)最近写了一篇文章，标题很能引起争议──“桑德拉•布洛克的交易”(The Sandra Bullock Trade)。当读者能够正确理解他的开篇之语的时候，会发现文章提出了一个发人深省的社会学问题。
Mr. Brooks starts by outlining the very good thing that happened to Ms. Bullock recently-her winning of the Academy Award for best actress-and the very bad thing that happened to her, 'the news reports claiming that her husband is an adulterous jerk.' He goes on, 'So the philosophic question of the day is: Would you take that as a deal? Would you exchange a tremendous professional triumph for a severe personal blow?'
布鲁克斯开篇先是概述了布洛克最近遇到的好事──她获得了奥斯卡女主角奖，还有遇到的坏事──有新的报导说，她的丈夫是个出轨的混蛋。布鲁克斯接着写道，因此，现在的哲学问题是：假如是你，你会接受这样一项交易吗？你会用个人生活遭受严重打击来换取事业上的巨大成功吗？
Now, this is a philosophic question, as Mr. Brooks says, and phrased conditionally, but nevertheless some readers-including a good friend of mine and several commenters on the Times's site-viewed it as his criticizing Ms. Bullock for somehow choosing to win an Oscar at the expense of pleasing her reportedly loathsome husband. Not so. Mr. Brook is simply making the point that Ms. Bullock and others with professional success and personal setbacks may be facing a much rawer deal than many people would think.
现在，正如布鲁克斯所说的，这是一个哲学问题。尽管他说的是“假如”，但一些读者──包括我的一个好朋友和好几个在《纽约时报》网站上发表评论的人──都把这视为是他在批评布洛克选择赢得奥斯卡奖，而牺牲了取悦她据说可恶的丈夫。不是这样。布鲁克斯只是在说，布洛克和其他事业有成而生活不幸的人可能面临的是一种比很多人以为的更不公平的境况。
'Marital happiness is far more important than anything else in determining personal well-being,' Mr. Brooks writes. 'If you have a successful marriage, it doesn't matter how many professional setbacks you endure, you will be reasonably happy. If you have an unsuccessful marriage, it doesn't matter how many career triumphs you record, you will remain significantly unfulfilled.'
布鲁克斯写道，在决定个人幸福方面，婚姻的幸福远比其他任何事情都更重要。如果你婚姻幸福，无论你承受多少事业上的挫折都无所谓，你仍会相当快乐。如果你婚姻不幸，无论你事业有多成功，都于事无补，你仍然很没有成就感。
Mr. Brooks cites several findings from research on happiness, all reinforcing his idea that the personal trumps the monetary almost entirely in determining true emotional well-being. 'The overall impression from this research is that economic and professional success exists on the surface of life, and that they emerge out of interpersonal relationships, which are much deeper and more important,' he writes. 'The second impression is that most of us pay attention to the wrong things. Most people vastly overestimate the extent to which more money would improve our lives.'
布鲁克斯引用了有关幸福的好几个研究结果，所有的都支持了他的观点：在决定真正情感上的幸福方面，个人的幸福几乎完全超过了金钱。他写道，这项研究给我的总体印象是，经济和职业成功只是存在于生活的表层，是从人际关系中产生出来的，人际关系则更深入、更重要。第二个印象是，我们大部分人都把目光放到了错误的事情上。大多数人都严重高估了金钱对我们生活的改善程度。
I'm fortunate to have enjoyed a lot of personal-life success, with a thrillingly brilliant and loving wife, two wonderful children and many great friends and relatives. I've also had a reasonable amount of professional success in the field I've wanted to be in since age 6. But if I had to choose between the two in some way, I would come down as Mr. Brooks does. There's no amount of professional glory that compares to the deep security and contentment I derive from knowing that my family and friends are there for me, and I for them.
我很幸运地享受了很多个人生活上的成功，我有一位聪明而有爱心的妻子、两个好孩子，还有很多很棒的亲戚朋友。我还在自己从六岁开始就想从事的行业中获得了相当的职业成功。不过，如果我必须从这两者之间选择一个的话，我会像布鲁克斯一样做。任何事业上的荣耀都比不上我对家人和朋友的这种认知所带来的安全和满足：他们会支持我，我也会支持他们。
Readers, what's your take on professional or monetary success vs. interpersonal relationships? Have you grown markedly happier with more material gains, or have they mattered less than the personal side of things?
读者们，你会选择事业或金钱上的成功，还是人际关系上的成功？有了更多的物质享受，你有没有变得快乐的多？抑或，物质上的成就没有个人幸福重要？
