生活水平日益提高,但是人们却没有以前的幸福感了,是什么偷走了人们的幸福?
丹麦人的幸福感源于平等;新加坡人的幸福感源于法律;印度加尔各答贫民窟的人的幸福感源于相互依靠彼此的心。
In Denmark, happiness comes from equality; in Singapore,happiness comes from the rule of law; in the slums of Calcutta, India,happiness comes from the hearts of people that depends on each other。
不难发现,一个人幸福与否,更多地取决于这两个方面:一个是外部的,即我们居住的社会大环境;另一个是内部的,即我们自己对待生活得态度。现在我们中国人感到不幸福,也可以分析为以下几个方面。
It is not difficult to see, whether a person is happy or not,largely depends on two aspects. One is external, that is the social environment we live in; the other is internal, that is our personal attitude to life. Today, we (Chinese people) are not happy,also can be analyzed in several aspects。
1. Lack of faith (beliefs)(缺乏信念) 。
Most people do not know what the expectations are in one’s whole life, simply put it, you do not know what you want.Confucius atecoarse rice, drank water, didn’t even have pillows when sleep ingandused his arms as pillows, but Confucius said, “Happiness is within”; He said, “A basket of cooked rice, a ladle of water, living in the ghetto alley”,others might think this is an unbearable life,but Confucius was able to “keep his happiness”. Why? Because he knew what he is pursuing in this life。
许多人都不知道他人生中最期待的是什么,仅仅放下,你不知道你想要什么。孔子吃糙米喝水,甚至睡觉都没有枕头,而仅仅以手臂为枕,但孔夫子说,“乐亦在其中矣”;他说:“饭疏食,饮水,曲肱而枕之”,其他人可能认为这是不能忍受的生活,但孔子却能“保持幸福”。为什么呢?因为他知道他追求的就是这种生活。
2. Always comparing(老是比较)。
Western saying goes, Whether a person is fortunate or not, happy or not, does not depend on how big of accomplishment he/she has achieved, but from the way how the neighbors look at them. When what we are pursuing is not happiness, but to be happier than others, then happiness will be even further away from us。
西方谚语说,一个人是否幸运,是否快乐,不取决于他取得了多大的成就,而是他的邻居怎么看他。一旦我们追求的不是如何幸福,而是怎么比别人幸福时,幸福反而会更加远离我们。
3. Living in happiness without realizing it(生在福中不知福)。
If a light has been constantly lit, you will not pay attention to it, but if it is brighter and darker at times, or if it is on and off at times, you will notice. Similarly, sometimes we are envied by others, but we hardly notice it. Only if one day we loss that,then we will realize。
如果灯被点亮,你就不会去注意它,如果它时亮时暗或者时关时开,你就会注意到它。同样道理,有时我们被别人艳羡,我们不大发觉。可一旦某天失去了,我们就会察觉。
4. Not moved by beautiful things( 缺乏发现美的眼睛)。
“The spring wind is so selfless, not asking for anything inreturn but blossomed millions of flowers。” We may not have the ability to create beauty, but have we been appreciating the beauty of nature,or the beautiful things created by others? We often ignore and unaware of the natural beauty, artistic beauty,spiritual beauty and many beautiful things in life around us。
“春风如此无私,不问索取,却使得遍地花开。”我们可能不能创造美,但可以欣赏自然美,或者其他人创造的美。我们常常忽视或不了解自然之美、艺术之美,精神之美以及一切我们身边美好的事物。
5. Do not know how to give( 不知奉献)。
Zhang Shangying from Song dynasty said,“Nothing is happier than being happy of doing good deeds”, only a person who knows how to give rather than just take can be truly happy. Charity is not aprivilege of the rich. Donating millions to disaster relief is charity, give a stranger a smile is also charity。
宋朝的张商英曾说,“没有比做好事更快乐的了。”只有当一个人懂得给予而不是一味索取的时候才会感到真正的快乐。慈善不是富人的特权。捐献几百万救灾是慈善,给陌生人个微笑也是慈善。
6. Not being content( 不知足)。
How much does a person need to be satisfied?Never enough!
一个人什么时候才能满足?永远不会满足。
When you are not happy because you don’t have shoes, have you noticed those who do not have feet? Contentment brings happiness。
当你不满足是因为你没有一双鞋的时候,你注意到有些人没有穿鞋的脚了吗?知足常乐。
Harold Albert is the academic director of the University of California. Once he walked on the street full of dissatisfaction and confusion because he had already lost his job and was looking for new work. He walked in the road like a depressed person,completely lost confidence and courage。
HaroldAlbert是加州大学的教务处主任。有次,他曾满怀不满和困惑地走在街头,因为他丢了工作,在找新的工作。他走在路上像个沮丧的人,失去了信心和勇气。
Just then, a man with no legs came, sitting on a small wooden platform which was attached with wheels from old skates. Hecarried 2 pieces of wood and wheeled himself across the street。
就在这时,一个没有腿的人经过,坐在一个附着在旧溜冰轮子的木头平板上,带着两片木头,滑过街道。
When Harold saw him, he had just crossed the street, trying toraise himself a few inches to get on the pavement. Harold’s eyes methis, the disabled man said happily, “Good morning! Sr. Nice morning weather, is not it?” At the time Harold felt a strange sense of satisfaction.He thought, I have 2 legs, he has no legs, but he is so happy, what reason do I have to be upset? So Harold became more confident, and went on happily。
Harold发现了他,他刚穿过街,试着把自己举高几英寸以登上人行道。他们四目相对,那个残疾人高兴地说:“早上好!早上天气真好,不是吗?”这时Harold感到一种莫名的满足。他想,他有两条腿,而他却没有腿,但他仍然开心,他又有什么理由心烦呢?所以,Harold变得更加自信,快乐地生活着。
7. Anxiety is everywhere( 无处不焦虑)。
Anxiety of safety, wealth, health and anxietyof children’s education and employment… Only a person who is carefree can be happy。
担心安全、财富、健康,担心孩子的教育问题和工作……只有当一个人不焦虑时才能幸福快乐。
8. Too much pressure/stress( 压力过大)。
Political pressure, pressure from work,family, emotional stress,financial stress, interpersonal pressure,psychological pressure andphysical pressure
政治压力,工作、家庭压力,情绪上的压力,经济压力,人际关系压力,心理和生理压力。
9. Standards are too high(标准太高)。
Using person’s own standard to demand others“If I can, why can’t you?”
用自己的标准去要求他人,“我能做到,为什么你不能?”
Using other’s standard to demand oneself, “If he can, why can’t I?”
用他人的标准来要求自己,“他能做到,为什么我不能?”
10. Not being oneself( 不能做回自己)。
A person who becomes a good son, a good husband, a good father, a good friend, a good partner… but if a person can not become someone that himself/herself desires, always fighting with oneself,then this person has no balance, and naturally, it is difficult for him/her to betruly happy。
一个人能做到好儿子,好爸爸,好朋友,好伴侣,但是如果一个人不能做到他想做到的,老是和自己斗争,那么他就平衡不了,自然很难让他自己真正快乐起来。