1.You feel like you have to wear a mask.

你觉得必须掩饰自己。

 

If you’re putting on a song-and-dance in an elaborate attempt to impress your partner, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果你为了使对方印象深刻而精心策划一翻，并戴上假面面具，那你可能在约会错的人。

 

Your partner should love you as you are. Does it feel like they are trying to mold you into an entirely different person? If so, it might be time to let them go.

你的另一半应该爱你本身。有没有觉得他们试图将你刻造成一个完全不同的人？如果有，是时候放手了。

 

2.They think the world revolves around them.

他们认为世界围绕着自己转。

 

If it seems like your partner is more interested in how you fit in their world than they are with your individual needs, you might be dating the wrong person.

比起称你的心意，如果你的另一半更在乎让你来适应他们的需求，那你可能在跟错的人约会。

 

Even though you just went to his parents’ house for Thanksgiving last year, he gets upset when you suggest visiting your parents this year. Despite the fact that she knows you haven’t had a night out with the guys in over a month because work’s been so busy, she pitches a fit because you’re not spending time with her. If your partner’s words and actions scream, “ME-ME-ME,” you should find someone who appreciates your needs (and not only theirs).

即便你去年感恩节去拜访过他的父母，今年你提出去你父母家，他可能都会生气。还有即使她知道你因工作繁忙很久都没有跟兄弟伙聚会，还是会因你没有陪她而大发神经。要是你另一半的行径总是围绕“我-我-我”这个字，那你就该找个尊重你需求的人（而不仅仅是他们的）。

 

3.Your friends and family haven’t met them.

你的朋友没有见过他们。

 

If you haven’t introduced your partner to your friends or family despite spending a decent amount of time together, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果你还没有介绍对方给你的亲朋好友，即便是一起正式吃顿饭的经历都没有，那对方可能就是错的人。

 

Let’s just face it, shall we? There are only a few reasons why you wouldn’t introduce your partner to your friends or family, and none of them are pretty. If you’re so embarrassed by this person that you don’t want to invite them into your social circles, do everyone a favor and pull the plug.

我们面对现实，好么？你不把对象介绍给朋友或家人的原因只有寥寥几个，每一个都不在理。如果这个人让你难堪得无法介绍到你的社交圈，那就行行好终止这段恋情。

 

4.They don’t really listen to you.

他们不会真正地倾听你。

 

If your partner is always waiting for their turn to speak, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果你的另一半总是在等着发言的机会，你可能在约会错的人。

 

They always go off on tangents about their day at work, but never seem interested in yours. They always suggest where they’d like to go, but never seem to care what you think. If your partner does a whole lot of speaking (but never listens), you might want to find someone not so self-centered to share your life with.

他们也许总是峰回路转兜到自己整日的工作上，却对你的工作毫无兴趣。他们也许老是提议去哪，却不在乎你的想法。如果你的伴侣一直滔滔不绝（却从不倾听），也许你该找个并不那么自我的人来分享你的人生。

 

5.Hanging out with them drains you.

约会让你精疲力尽。

 

If spending time with your partner exhausts you, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果跟另一半在一起让你耗尽精力，那也许你在约会错的人。

 

Even the best of relationships include the occasional fight, but this should be the exception, not the norm. You should feel happy and alive with your partner, not sad and stuck.

即使最美好的爱情也会时有摩擦，但这只是偶然，并不经常。跟爱人在一起的时候你应是幸福的，而非悲伤困顿。

 

6.You avoid difficult conversations.

你会逃避有深度的话题。

 

If every difficult chat gets swept under the rug, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果每次有深度的讨论都被一语带过，那你可能在约会错的人。

 

Should you bring up things like politics, religion, or your desire to have five children on the first date? Probably not. But as the weeks and months and years go on, it becomes more and more important to have those tough (but necessary) conversations. If you want to have children but your partner doesn’t, you might have a problem. If your religion is a top priority but your partner is anything but a devout follower, you need to have a chat. If there’s something the matter, say so (because no, your partner isn’t a psychic).

你有没有在次约会时提出政治、宗教或想要生五个小孩的话题？也许你没有提过。但时间一周，一月，一年地流逝，这些沉重（却必要）的话题就变得越来越重要了。如果你想要小孩，而对方却不想，这可能是个问题。如果你是个虔诚的信徒，而对方却是个无神论者，你们就需要谈谈。如果你们之间有什么问题的话，尽管说出来（因为你的伴侣不会读心术）。

 

7.Your relationship is their one and only interest.

对方只对爱情感兴趣。

 

If your partner has no hobbies or interests outside of your relationship, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果对方除了谈恋爱之外就没有了其他的兴趣爱好了，你可能在约会错的人。

 

Who would want to date a person who isn’t passionate about anything? Tread carefully if your partner has zero life goals, because relationships with a person lacking ambition are anything but fulfilling.

谁愿意跟一个毫无激情的人约会呢？如果你的伴侣没有任何的人生目标，那你要谨慎小心了，因为跟一个没有追求的人谈恋爱毫无充实感可言。

 

8.They expect 24/7 companionship.

他们想要全天候的陪伴。

 

If your partner is so clingy you want to scream, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果你的另一半黏你黏到抓狂，你也许在约会错的人。

 

It is unhealthy and unwise to expect a person to be your singular source of happiness. Alone time isn’t merely just something that would be nice to have, but rather a necessity for your mental health.

将某人当做幸福的源头，这是既不健康又不明智的行为。独处的时光不仅美好，而且也是保持心理健康的必要条件。

 

9.You never feel like you’re “good enough.”

你从不觉得自己“足够好。”

 

If your partner never has anything nice to say, you might be dating the wrong person.

如果对方从来没有称赞过你的好，那你可能在约会错的人。

 

No matter how hard you try, you feel like you can’t do anything right. No matter how much you do, you feel like you always have to prove yourself. No matter how much you love them, you feel like they don’t return the feeling.

无论多么努力，你始终觉得自己没有做好。无论付出了多少，你总是觉得需要去证明自己。无论多么爱对方，你都觉得得不到回应。

 

10.You can’t imagine a future together without laughing or crying.

没有撕心裂肺的哭笑，未来就想象不了。

 

If the thought of a life-long commitment makes you want to curl up in a ball and weep, you might be dating the wrong person.

若一想到终身承诺，你就想蜷缩起来，那你可能在约会错的人。

 

I know the thought of being alone might not appeal to you, but staying in a relationship that is destined for failure is as silly as it gets. If you have no future with this person, end the relationship and find someone you can be happy with.

我知道独处的说法可能吸引不到你，但沉溺于一段注定无果的感情里也傻得可怜。如果你跟这个人看不到未来，那就结束这段感情，然后去寻找那个能让你幸福的人。（via：大耳朵英语）

 

词汇学习：

 

elaborate [i'læbərət, i'læbəreit] adj. 精心制作的；详尽的；煞费苦心的vt. 精心制作；详细阐述；从简单成分合成（复杂有机物）vi. 详细描述；变复杂

pitch [pitʃ] vi. 倾斜；投掷；搭帐篷；坠落vt. 投；掷；定位于；用沥青涂；扎营；向前倾跌n. 沥青；音高；程度；树脂；倾斜；投掷

decent ['di:sənt] adj. 正派的；得体的；相当好的

tangent ['tændʒənt] adj. 切线的，相切的；接触的；离题的n. [数] 切线，[数] 正切

devout [di'vaut] adj. 虔诚的；衷心的

clingy ['kliŋi] adj. 紧贴的；粘住的